Vodka and Her Red Hair

"At first she was loud and disturbing, I thought. In those days, she was the first person that woke me up, but I felt she was being a leach. I thought she was just a girl who liked me... My principles kept me above the pedestals of feeling, but now... I went to a seminar the day before yesterday, that happy voice that I took for granted wasn't far from me. I watched her sit, she did not look side ways or to her back, damn! Her model body. I once suggested it to her but, she looked into my eyes like she was searching for something, something I knew what but, drove it to a corner. I wasn't made for this, I told myself.
She was looking forward, alone in her time and essence. I was behind her, but she wouldn't look back. I could feel it, her heart had gone cold towards me and its my fault.
Remembering her smile, the way words rolled out her mouth and her beauty consciousness, makes me wish I could freeze time and remove some parts..."
"Don't worry, it happens. With time it would be just another morbid memory." Mr Cole drops the glass and drinks straight from the bottle.
"where are you drinking to?" I ask
"it tastes better straight from the bottle." he pours the vodka in the glass cup into bottle.
"yeah, I have told myself that countless number of times, but I end up praying one of these days she just texts." I flick the cover of the vodka bottle into a woman's bag across the table. She has a nice body but, facially she was off.
"Then text her, or better yet give her a call."
"I can't give her a call or text her, at least not anymore... I will look desperate. These days, when I text her, I can feel a gulf between us, so I stop and she never makes a mistake of saying 'hi'." My movement almost knocks the bottle down from the table, but Mr Cole holds it. Not that I'm drunk, I haven't even tasted it. The glass is still in front of me with the vodka still at the same level. Mr Cole seems to be the only one enjoying it and guzzling down the contents of the bottle.
"Well, you are the one in love." Mr Cole says
"In love?" I chuckle "I cant fall in love. It's weak. No not me." I look around the restaurant again and at the lady whose bag I flicked a bottle cover inside. I noticed that even with how facially ugly she was, her red hair and the way she spoke, gave her elegance.
"So you don't love her." He was now drunk. "what then do you want from her?"
I could say this was the most sensible thing Mr Cole had ever said, unfortunately its when he's drunk. I never really thought of what I wanted from her.
"I don't know. Sincerely... I dont know."